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I got my nose peirced monday, and i am surprized that it hasnt been red or bloody at all. It only hurts when i randomly touch my nose because i easily forget that its there. Oh god, i am obsessed. i kindof want to get my septum done. but before that, i need to redue my monroe. nipples are a possibility. eeep.

so lately ivebeen thinking, and i have decided to giveup on trying to have a relationship with anyone. Im not even gonna think about it because i realized that i am happy by myself. This is the first time in my life i seriously have noone, and u know what?? i am content. its amazing. ive always thought the only thing that can make me happy was a boy. a stupid boy. i was being really dumb. Everyone told me stuff like this before, but i never fully got it until i experienced it for myself. I have more time for myself,and first it was really lonely. Now that i see everything that i have accomplished during this time, i realized it was good for me.

even though it was rough, the past 5 or 6 months have changed me for the better. yeah it sucked major ass and it hurt ALOT, i feel i learned sooo much about myself.

time for bed, early class tomorrow

yessssss leahface in my class wit me!!!!!
Current Mood:
good and sleeeepy
imogen heap
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LOL omg not really im kindof mad.

hahahaha well no.

ex bf i still have feelings for MAKING OUT IN FRONT OF ME with ugly girl.

HAHAHA ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

well yeah. im not sad, just really mad because um........ totally rude and insensitive.

yeah yeah yeah. OMG hahahaaaaaaa what the fuck is wrong with everyone?!?!?!?!?

jesus. im moving to canada or something.

yeah that sounds good. or um, maybe just philly is far enough. i need an apartment soooooooooooon. fuck this place.

yeah grrrrrrrrr mad. at least its not sad. sad is so much worse.

i hate thissss. i need to meet new people.

Current Mood:
angry angry
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EEEP back to philly tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lets seeeeeeeeeeeee

monday: Painting 1 8:30 - 3:30

tuesday: Topics in Lit 10:00 - 11:20 & African Art 3:30 - 6:20

wednesday: World History 12:30 - 3:20

thursday: Topics in Lit 10:00 - 11:20

friday: Sculptural Studies 8:30 - 3:20

eh.... no drawing class this semster :( no room for it because i had to go and fail topics in lit last year like a regect.

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im pretty sure my visit to waynesboro was amazing.

hopefully me and leah will drive back there a few weekends during school time.

and hopefully ian and them will visit philly soooooon.


im going to move there and open a sex shop with fake peens and old lady pornos.

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I met stupid kid today AAAND i met ian. finally. and i heard quentin say "cookie head." (it was amazing)We ate at this cool resaurant leah likes to call the pig troth. Well on my way here i guess i rode the turnpike on the wrong side of the road into oncoming traffic because there was no median after the toll and i was told to GO LEFT. Yeah. Fun. im not really dumb, i swear.

so i went to the pocanos the other day overnight...not cool. the kid that took me (that i was sort of dating) got drunk and decided to try and get with this girl right in front of me. i mean i was in the hot tub with them the whole time. not cool. so for the whole rest of the trip i we didnt talk after that. it was very akward. Yeah, not a good time. Plus my body hurts from snowboarding and breaking my face and ass from falling so much.

tomorrows gonna be sweet.

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i guess i am finally done.

it feels weird, but it will get better. how could it get any worse honestly?

im still scared

god, i seriously cant believe how much of this shit i took for so long.

Current Mood:
scared scared
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i cant keep doing this but i cant stop.

im so stuck. so very very stuck in this horrible little trap

this is probably the worst feeling in the world. or at least one of the worst.

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Well, hmm. Yes. UM.

Confused much??? Yes. Very much. Hurt much???? Yes, but i accept it.

Yet now, i feel happy. I dont understand it, but i feel fine..... maybe its because i have finally realized that theres nothing more i can possibly do. I did everything. But why would that make me happy?? Hmm. Weird much?

I suppose its because i know i did what i could for once. I actually tried.

Well today was a good day. I woke up at like 2 and went shopping and watched harry potter with sean. I got a sweet cd for only 1.99. i love good cheap cds. anyway, me and margie went to philly and just walked around and whatnot. i finally put up more stickers. i put up alot to try and make up for all of my neglect.

I'm happy for my break. all ive been doing is hangng out with people and painting. basically everything is fine, except when i get ignored and/or used. Yeah.

missy elliot
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